Be Close
One of the fundamental principles of Prophetic education and teaching is to be close to your audience, to interact with them warmly, and to show a sense of closeness. Many parents and teachers keep a significant distance from those under their care, citing concerns such as, “If I get too close, my authority as a parent/teacher will be undermined, and my children/students will become lax, spoiled, disobedient, and I won’t be able to educate them properly.” 1
They struggle to strike a balance between maintaining seriousness and dignity on the one hand, and demonstrating closeness and sincerity on the other. Today, research and findings from pedagogical experts emphasize that achieving and maintaining this balance is essential for effective education. Verbal or non-verbal expressions of closeness strengthen the willpower of those being educated, motivate them to learn, enrich mutual relationships in education, foster love and respect, and create an atmosphere of trust. As a natural consequence, productivity increases, and disciplinary issues decrease significantly. Conversely, in environments where the closeness required by education and training cannot be established, effective teaching and upbringing cannot be properly achieved.
Closeness to One’s Audience is Divine Morality!
From the perspective of divine morality, the truth that God is close to His servants sheds significant light on our subject. In the Qur’an, when introducing God, He is also described as “Karîb” ألقريب), meaning”near to His servants. “The verse states: “When My servants ask you about Me, [tell them] I am indeed near. I respond to the supplication of the one who calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be guided to the right way and find peace.” 2
In another verse, this closeness is described with a striking analogy: “We have certainly created man, and We know what his soul whispers to him, for We are closer to him than [his] jugular vein.” 3
Thus, every individual can present their needs and desires directly to their Lord without requiring any intermediary. God hears everyone’s requests and responds to their prayers, sometimes as they ask and sometimes in ways even better than what they requested. Knowing this divine closeness instills immense peace, reassurance, and confidence in a person. This awareness strengthens their bond with their Creator, bringing them closer to Him. It fortifies their faith and submission, increases their piety, and refines their words and actions. When turning to God, they harbor not the slightest doubt, asking, “Will He hear me? Will He respond to my needs?” Instead, they pray with heartfelt conviction and certainty. Indeed, there is no alternative that can replace this profound spiritual closeness. No matter where a person may be, they can call upon their Lord, who is closer to them than their jugular vein, and present all their needs to Him. No one can prevent their voice from reaching their Creator or block their requests. As the Qur’an declares: “… Wherever you may be,He is with you through His infinite knowledge and power, as the one true Lord and God, at every moment and in every place.” 4
This faith strengthens the believer’s will power, enabling them to constantly monitor their words and actions, which in turn enhances their character. On one journey, the Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him) observed that some of his companions were raising their voices excessively while praising and glorifying God. To uphold the sense of divine closeness, he advised them: “O people, take it easy on yourselves! You are not calling upon someone who is deaf or distant. Rather, you are calling upon One who is with you wherever you may be. Verily, God is exalted and majestic, both ‘As-Sami’ (All-Hearing) and ‘Al-Qarib’ (Ever-Near).” 5
Thus, God’s declaration of His closeness to His servants, and the care and effort they exert to honor this closeness, become a profound means of purifying individuals from harmful thoughts and emotions, protecting them from evil, and motivating them towards excellence in faith, deeds, and character. God’s nearness to His servants and His declaration of this closeness teach parents and educators the crucial principle of “being close to those they engage with, standing near them, and making them feel that closeness.” Just as the Lord of the worlds conveys His nearness in a deeply impactful way, filling hearts with His love and drawing them to willing obedience, parents and educators must similarly foster heartfelt closeness, nurturing trust, and inspiring positive transformation.
Closeness to One’s Audience is a Prophetic Virtue!
The Qur’an commands the Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him): “Spread your wings of love, compassion, and mercy over the believers who follow you.” 6
This directive emphasizes the necessity of showing profound closeness to one’s audience in order to educate them and purify them from wrongdoings. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) fulfilled this command with perfection, elevating his closeness to his followers to the highest level. The Qur’an highlights this unparalleled relationship, stating: “The Prophet is closer to the believers than their own selves.” 7
The Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him) himself articulated this closeness, saying: “By the One in Whose hand is my soul, there is no believer for whom I am not the closest of all people, both in this world and in the Hereafter.” Through this, he explicitly conveyed his deep sense of connection with every believer. Furthermore, he did not merely express this truth but also embraced the material responsibilities that came with it, declaring: “Whoever leaves behind wealth, let it go to their heirs. But if they leave behind debt or dependents in need of care, let them come to me, for I am their closest relation.” 8
As the first teacher of the believers, the Prophet both defined his role in relation to his audience and taught all believers, from his initial companions to those who would follow until the Day of Judgment, the importance of staying close to the Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him). He proclaimed: “By the One in Whose hand is my life, no one has truly believed until I am more beloved to them than their family, parents, children, wealth, and all of humanity.” 9
With these declarations, he not only emphasized the necessity of a teacher or guide being close to their students but also highlighted the need for students to draw close to their teacher in order to benefit fully from them.The Prophet’s sense of closeness and sensitivity extended not only to believers but also to non-believers. The indifference of some people to his relentless efforts to guide them would deeply sadden him. “10
The Qur’an describes how the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) would almost wear himself out with grief over their rejection: “You are almost consumed with grief because they do not believe.” 11
The Companions Were Also Close to the Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him)
Just as the Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him) was close to his companions, the noble Companions, having learned this lesson from him, were also close to him. Had they not maintained this closeness, they would not have been able to benefit from his knowledge, faith, wisdom, and character. Their love and proximity to him were so profound that they prioritized him above all else, both materially and spiritually. They loved him more than their own lives and expressed this closeness with the heartfelt declaration: “May my parents be sacrificed for you, O Messenger of God!” (peace and blessings be upon him) 12
This deep love and respect were maximally utilized by the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) in nurturing and teaching them. He meticulously imparted the details of an Islamic way of life, ensuring their understanding and practice of every aspect. So great was this closeness and meticulous guidance that even the polytheists, who sought to ridicule the Prophet and his companions, could not ignore it. On one occasion, they approached the respected Salman al-Farisi in an attempt to mock him, saying, “We see that your Prophet even concerns himself with matters like your toilet etiquette!” In response, Salman confidently affirmed: “Yes, indeed! He teaches us everything, even matters of cleanliness. For example, he has forbidden us from using our right hand for cleaning ourselves, facing the Qibla while relieving ourselves, or using animal bones or dung for cleaning.” 13
They Considered Him So Close That They Could Share Their Deepest Concerns
The Companions regarded the Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him) as so close and approachable that they could comfortably seek his counsel even on the most sensitive and personal matters.
One day, while the Prophet was in the Prophet’s Mosque, a young man approached him with an unusual and deeply privaterequest. Feeling there was no one closer to whom he could express such a private urge, the young man said: “O Messenger of God, (peace and blessings be upon him) I struggle to control my desires. Would you permit me to commit zina (fornication)?” Those present were outraged by the audacity of the request and attempted to silence the young man. However, the Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him) remained composed, calming the crowd with the instruction: “Leave him to me.” He then invited the young man to sit close to him and engaged him in a calm and understanding dialogue. The Prophet posed a series of questions, He asked the young man a series of questions, guiding him to see why his request was not appropriate. Then, demonstrating his profoundcloseness and compassion, the Prophet placed his hand on the young man’s chest and offered this heartfelt prayer: “O Allah, purify this young man’s heart from evil thoughts, forgive his sins, and grant him chastity.” 14
This heartfelt prayer and the Prophet’s tender approach transformed the young man. He became one of Medina’s most chaste individuals and was later married off by the Prophet himself. This incident illustrates that educators and mentors can only provide effective guidance to their audience if they maintain a sense of closeness. When young people perceive their parents, teachers, or guides as distant, they hesitate or fear sharing their inner struggles. Lacking the guidance they need, they may falter during critical times. Without someone to offer closeness and support after they stumble, recovering and correcting their mistakes becomes exceedingly difficult.
Thus, the approach taken by the Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him) and his Companions is a universal model for educatorsand mentors. A person who does not maintain closeness with others cannot effectively convey their message, nor can they draw their audience closer to themselves or their teachings. They fail to inspire change, nurture character, or educate effectively. Itis also important to recognize that closeness involves both verbal and non-verbal elements. Without fulfilling these, claims of closeness remain hollow and unfulfilled.
Author: Dr. Selim Koç
References:
1.For a more comprehensive discussion, see Aynur Geçer, Deniz Deryakulu, The Effect of Teacher Proximity on Students’ Achievement, Attitudes, and Motivation Levels, dergipark.org.tr
2.Surah Al-Baqarah, 2:186; see also Surah Hud, 11:61; Surah Saba, 34:50
3.Surah Qaf, 50:16
4.Surah Al-Hadid, 57:4
5.Bukhari, Jihad131 (2992); Muslim, Dhikr13/44 (2704)
6.Surah Ash-Shu’ara, 26:215
7.Surah Al-Ahzab, 33:6
8.Muslim, Faraid5/14-16 (1619)
9.Bukhari, Iman8 (14, 15); Muslim, Iman16/69, 70 (44)
10.See Surah Al-Inshirah, 94:3
11.Surah Ash-Shu’ara, 26:3; Surah Al-Kahf, 18:6
12.See Bukhari, Maghazi38 (4205)
13.Muslim, Tahara17/57-60 (262)
14.Ahmad Ibn Hanbal, Musnad, V/257 (22847); Tabarani, VIII/190 (7679); Zaynuddin Al-Iraqi, Takhrij al-Ihya, II/411; Haythami, Majma’ al-Zawa’id, I/129